Christian Dating: Six Ways To Find Your Spiritual Match by Jim DeSantis

As an ancient Pastoral Counselor I can confidently claim that one with the biggest mistakes produced by Christians is thinking they can convert a non-Christian into a Christian by just having an intimate relationship. Yes, we are to be described as a light on the globe for non-Christians but it is beyond our earthly capacity to convert you to definitely our faith either with words or direct action on our part.



We has to be extremely careful to avoid trying to complete the task of the Holy Spirit.



It could be the Holy Spirit who draws a person to the Christian faith. This "draw" may result in a deeply personal decision that can't be coerced by our logical arguments. There is really a saying: "A person convinced against their will is from the same opinion still." This is never more true when used on matters from the Christian faith.



So, how can this affect dating and relationships for Christians?



The Bible informs us that the heart is "deceitful" above all things. Emotions can readily convince us the person individuals desire may be the one whom we require, and must have, no matter their beliefs. This is at the root from the failure on most relationships between Christians and non-Christians since become blinded by emotional need and ignore exactly what the Bible teaches about relationships. Eventually, the spiritual conflict becomes unbearable.



Our emotional needs make getting solid Christian relationship advice more critical today laptop or computer has have you been. Society is throwing numerous conflicting messages at us every day. The dating message is confusing enough for Christians without adding the influence of TV sitcoms, Hollywood movies, and pop culture magazines who set a bad tone for what is acceptable in relationships and marriage.



By ignoring the worldly messages and following biblical moral guidelines you'll stay on the right path but you may invariably be challenged because you may be counter to what the majority of society considers normal.



As a Christian, you are called to become "on earth" however, not "in the world" in most decision you're making. This includes your dating relationships and marriage. You risk heart break before you choose to become "with the world."



It is true that Christian relationship advice can feel confusing, but, there might be no confusion about what the Bible has got to say about marriage and morals. With Bible teachings at heart, here are several suggestions to make you stay on on your path:



1. Ignore peer pressure!



No doubt you've non-Christian friends and acquaintances. We do not reside in a spiritual bubble. But, you might be the only 1 who is responsible for your choices. No one can force you to definitely ignore your Christian values.



Yes, it can be difficult to resist a night out with friends who believe bars and clubs are enjoyable or that casual physical intimacy is acceptable behavior. Yes, these so-called friends could even try to cause you to feel like a "Jesus freak" to be able to convince you that the little "sin" won't hurt you.



But, should you really want to become "light on earth" then show these friends which you value your Christian morals greater than what they offer and you are not in the slightest degree ashamed of it.



The serious problem with giving in is, you may immediately notice the admonition with the Holy Spirit. The Bible informs us "there is pleasure in sin for any season, then comes the judgement." You may even be deeply disappointed in yourself and you also could end up in a very relationship with somebody that will only give you emotional pain. As you are able to see, there's no profit in for you giving in.



2. There is wisdom in numerous Christian counselors!



When seeking relationship advice, the hardest situation you can do is seek Christian relationship advice from secular self-help books, people like Dr. Phil, Oprah, along with other daytime talk shows. Theirs is worldly advice that will not serve you well. If you want truly helpful relationship advice, seek out a Christian counselor or material specifically created for Christians.



Since you might be a Christian, simply a Christian can present you with advice about dating someone from another Christian denomination or dating an unbeliever. You could possibly be advised which a Roman Catholic dating a Baptist might not work. From Christian sources you'll also hear trustworthy advice about physical intimacy and marriage that will make sense from the biblical perspective.



The whole point of only getting Christian relationship advice is the same as getting advice from a poor man about how precisely you can become rich. The poor man is not going to know what he is talking about is he going to? Why then could you follow the advice of the non-Christian in matters from the heart? They simply do not know what you are talking about from the Christian perspective.



That said, be cautious about Christian advice that is certainly dogmatic or that cannot be reconciled through your personal study of scripture. When Paul preached, the Bereans said: "Let us study the scriptures to ascertain if these things are true." You should follow that advice.



3. Your true friends needs to be an obvious choice!



Do I must remind you that this only crowd you should hang with is also another Christians? You can have secular friends, at the same time, but choose them wisely. Limit the degree of your secular relationships to the people that respect the fact that you are a Christian and that do not attempt to corrupt your values.



You need to find places where your fellow believers hang out. This may involve progressively more active in church functions, attending Christian events, or maybe hanging out at a Christian coffee house. Your faith will probably be strengthened plus your light will shine even brighter in the world.



4. Marriage could be your goal but...!



It's a blunder to date should your only goal is marriage. Dating is a fancy exercise of discovery and needs being conducted as a result. It's an ideal situation in case you find the correct person next to but life's not that simple. You should talk with several people from the opposite sex in order to learn the following valuable lesson: We are inside flesh and also the flesh may be misleading. Get to know people, what makes them tick, before you get in a serious relationship.



5. Be cautious of "love initially sight."



It's easy to misinterpret the Holy Spirit's leading whenever we choose a mate determined by physical or emotional attraction to start with sight. The fact is, most successful marriages begin with friendship. Friendship gives each individual time to find out whether they compliment one another.



Physical or emotional attraction will never be the main factors. We all get old eventually and then we certainly want true love being there in the event the bloom finally falls off of the rose! The inner person is the one you may want to marry (and spend your lifetime with) irrespective Ary news talk shows of outward appearances.



6. Physical intimacy before marriage.



Be careful if the date tries to push you into physical intimacy before marriage. Just because they're a Christian doesn't imply they have power over their lust. We are inside flesh, remember? Your date might just want to have a chuckle at your expense and go forward once you ask to get a lifelong commitment.



Finally, allow me to encourage you.



Ask the Holy Spirit to steer you to another committed Christian with whom you'll be able to have a lifelong, loving relationship. Expect that there is someone around looking for any Christian mate as if you, too.



When you may well ask, resist telling the Holy Spirit how see your face should look, or they should be considered a person with material wealth, or anything else for that matter. Leave it to the Holy Spirit and He will bring you the person that He knows fits your needs.



Ask and be patient. You shall receive.





Jim DeSantis, is a Christian Theologian and retired Pastoral Counslor. For more articles like this, visit Jim's Spiritual Matters Blog - here. Or, click this link =>